Between Dusk and Dawn…

Some *scribble* *scribble* by Ameera

Tag Archives: Joy

Thoughts on love…

It’s windy here in Karachi tonight and as I sit here in my room, sipping hot milk and taking a short break from the books, my thoughts gently drift from one idea to another. It’s quiet and peaceful in my room and, after a fun and busy afternoon with my sister’s friends coming over, it’s nice to have some alone time.

The rest of my family is in my parents’ room, watching some light comedy show on TV. It makes me smile thinking of them all together, enjoying themselves. That’s because I know there’s contentment and love there. It makes me feel relaxed too, knowing that I can retreat to my room and study with a heart that’s at peace. Life has its ups and downs, for each one of us, and I know cracks and fissures can appear in the strongest of relationships. That’s why, I cherish these moments of comfortable companionship even more… knowing how trying it can be when things go sour, when people are hurt or wouldn’t talk to each other.

There’s so much to learn from watching other people, especially close family, and how they interact with each other. I’m the eldest daughter so I’ve naturally been witness to many incidents, scenes and changes in people around me and not just my own parents. I’ve been through times where things seemed difficult and didn’t make sense either. Why did she do that? Why did he have to say it that way? Then, over time, things started to fall into place. Childish notions of what ‘relationships’ meant were replaced by a different understanding – that each human being has some weaknesses, and that’s fine. It’s impossible to expect people to be perfect. Rather, the reality is that there are amazing people, each with their own particular shortcomings, but that doesn’t mean they’re failures in any way.

As I grow older, I learn something new everyday. I learn how families really function and that sometimes, real love and compassion lies in doing something that’s much different from idealistic expressions. I learn how keeping your mouth shut for five minutes can not only save you from a lot of trouble and embarrassment later, but can earn you much respect in the eyes of others. I learn how the darkest of times upon a family, upon two people who’re committed to each other, can turn into happiness and a real solid relationship that no one could even have imagined possible. It’s about holding onto patience and sincerely wishing to make things better, and if Allah Wills, it does get better… better than better.

I also learn little things from the many mistakes I make daily. When I talk to my sisters,  make a sarcastic comment, or hurt their feelings in anyway… the remorse after that and the pinching of my conscience shows where I was wrong. Sometimes, someone might need me for a minute or two and if I’m too busy in something I feel is more important (but which really isn’t)… it’s my loss in the end because what that person needed, was my love and attention. If I couldn’t give her that, what more could I ever possibly give that could compensate for that? Showering people with gifts is nice but if they know deep inside, you’re not a sincere person, it hardly means anything to them. Instead, make someone a cake or a cup of coffee or tea when you’re really busy and they really need it… that’s love. And that’ll leave it’s mark for sure.

Sigh… it’s either the effect of this hot milk I just drank or the light breeze coming in through the window… or maybe a tender moment fleeting across my soul… that these and so many other such thoughts have come to mind. Maybe it’s the satisfaction that I’m surrounded by people who do love me, just because they’re related to me by blood, and who do put up with my weaknesses and still like spending time with me. Maybe it’s the joy I find in their company, that I just want to express before it’s too late, before I never get another chance. Just today, my father got late coming back from his morning walk and, for an hour or so, I was worried to the point that I really just wanted to see him again and let him know how much he means to me. Alhumdulillah, he got back safe and, after giving him a “scolding” for not taking his cellphone, I did give him a hug too to let him know how much I missed him. Awkward as it may seem sometimes, it’s even more important to seize the moment while it’s there and not have to look back with any regrets later, Insha’Allah.

It’s getting late and I must put in some studying before I sleep. But wait a second… I just checked Facebook and my sister’s status update made this whole post even more relevant. You see, it was her birthday today and here’s what she wrote…

I have the Best friends and the Best family! Alhamdolillah! I mean they sent me off to Sunday Bazaar, snuck into my room, decorated it, blew up balloons, made a huge card, got a cake, gifts, a flower bouquet, a basket of chocolates!!, made pizza, cookies, cheese balls, gulab jamun and more AND almost gave me heart attack when I got home!!! No one would ever do this except out of love! ♥ So Thank you so so much! You made this a truly memorable and wonderful Birthday! There is really nothing I want except a bunch of loving and caring people!

Need I say anything more? Alhumdulillah! 

A Drop of Joy

What is joy?  Can you define happiness? Measure it? Can you assign it an absolute value?

No.

Can you find real happiness in wealth, estates and other luxuries appealing to the senses?

No.

For a few days now, my extended family was deeply concerned and worried regarding the health of a much-loved member, my maternal aunt. Out of the blue, we were told she had been diagnosed by a condition, the name of which many equate only with dismal pictures of health… cancer. It was striking how such news could affect so many peoples’ lives, in such different ways. Suddenly, nothing seemed really pleasureable and alongside, advice on how best to tackle the situation started pouring in. Being separated from the rest of us by the whole world, really, you can imagine her – and our – feelings at not being able to share her burdens. Telephone calls kept the messages of wellwishing and hope connected with one another.

The true gravity of the situation was assessed by conducting further standard tests. Not knowing what to expect but hoping for the best, my mother enquired about the results. Alhamdolillah, the results turned out to be very positive for her and even though she’ll have to go through surgery to remove the cancer, then chemotherapy to truly eradicate it, the news was sooooo good Alhamdolillah! Hearing my aunt’s electrified and easy voice over the telephone, indicative of her being back to her old self where spirits were concerned, I felt real, pure, wholesome joy overtake me! My mother was smiling, laughing… it was like Eid all over again!

This is a kind of happiness that you could spend your life in search of it, exhaust all your resources, and yet never be able to recognize its fragrance, let along experience it. The relief and joy that comes from knowing your family is safe has no measure. The little stresses and tensions of our routine that bug us throughout the day suddenly fade away and you find yourself in such happy spirits that nothing seems too difficult. Alhamdolillah… for letting us taste such joys in our lives. Perhaps they are “trailers” and “samples” pointing to the kind of joy that lies in wait of the Believers in Heaven – Allah knows best!

May Allah lighten up our lives with joy and happiness and make our families the “coolness of our eyes” , both in this world and the Hereafter indeed. Ameen!

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اللَّهُمَّ لا سَهْلَ إلَّا مَا جَعَلْتَهُ سَهْلاً وَ إنْتَ تَحْعَلُ الْحزْنَ إذَا شِئْتَ سَهْلاً

O Allah, there is nothing easy except what You make easy, and You make the difficult easy if it be Your Will.
[Ibn Hibban, ibn as-Sunni]

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